medical update

I talked to the doctor yesterday and he recommended that I get a chest xray just to rule some things out. So I had that today, but won't get the results for a couple of days or so.
Also wants me to have another blood tests but for slightly different things, so I'm having that on tuesday.
Am kinda pleased that my doctor wanted to do these tests because at this point I'd prefer to know one way or the other what's going on.
Assuming the xray is clear, he's probably going to refer me to a consultant or someone for a second opinion because apparently I'm a particularly interesting case hehe.

I'm not worrying about it so much at the moment but obviously it's still playing at the back of my mind so prayers are always welcome.

Other than that I'm using work as a distraction, particularly since holiday club preparation is starting which is very exciting :D but thats all. will post when I know more!
much love xxx

just another hiccup

so I had my blood test and got the results today, one of my levels is still high. its really weird to have just this level up apparently...my doctor is phoning me tomorrow to talk about it.

this latest hiccup has thrown me a little bit...I can't really explain it...I know I'm fine, I haven't got a life-threatening condition because otherwise my other levels would be showing something...I guess I just assumed that this blood test would be all clear and it would be over.

I feel like this whole year has been filled with little speed bumps that have tested me in different ways...not getting into UWE, not getting the halls I thought I would, different challenges at work...its made me grow up and definitely deepened my faith...I'm just trying to figure out how that helps me in this situation.
For instance, I now know to think in a straight line before bed, write down my thoughts first because otherwise I think in circles and can't sleep. I know that God wouldn't give me more than I can handle. I know that anything that happens is ok because He's with me.

But that doesn't stop the horrible knot in the pit of my stomach that gives me that uncomfortable feeling where I almost want to cry just in order to let the emotion out.
I've got that knot right now.

I don't know whether you're following any of this. I just needed to get it out before I could go to bed. It's not like I can change anything about the blood test tonight and I can't talk to the doctor any earlier so I should just relax. Unfortunately that's easier said than done!

Either way I'm going to bed now, I'm going to pray for peace and hopefully get a good night's sleep because I think that I look like i need it!

will write tomorrow about what the doctor says.
much love xxx

a further apology

PJ has just come up and been nice about me getting up in the morning so everything's ok.
I felt I should apologise for ranting about it.

much love xxx

apologies to all

just over a week since last blog, I do have a pretty good excuse though- I'm off work this week!
this means that I'm at my computer less and also less likely to use my blog as a means of procrastination....not that I would ever do that...

last weekend I spent some very nice time with my friends, in particular my Eurovision party on saturday night, more people than normal ended up coming and it was such a fun night, just alot of genuinely lovely friends :) UK did rubbish but then we all expected that.

on sunday I was involved in the all age worship service at LF doing puppets, actions and generally having fun. plus I got to see a 2 year old play the best solo on an inflatable guitar EVER!!!

the last couple of days I've just been able to chill out and spend some time with the family. I'm also hamster-sitting this week which has made me incredibley nervous since she belongs to 2 children from church and I don't want anything to happen to her....ooh which reminds me, I must go refill her water....
sorry about that, am back now!

tomorrow is PJ's 16th birthday, I assume we're going to do the usual present opening type thing but other than that he has yet to specify how he wants to spend the day. in the evening he's seeing Hannah but other than that i have no idea...and he's being particularly stressy at the moment so I haven't bothered to push him for an answer...not worth the effort.

as for the rest of this week:
thursday I am hopefully having my final blood test, I'm feeling well-rested and not ill at all so the levels should all be normal, if not then I guess we go from there but I'm less concerned about it now than I was a couple of weeks ago.
I'm also going pattern shopping with Kat and my nan since we (Kat and I, that is) are going to be cheerleaders whilst doing the actions at holiday club, cue the pom poms and little skirts! we own pom poms already hehe and the little skirts will be going on over our jeans (this is a children's holiday club after all!) but we're very excited about it :D

friday I'm having my hair cut, ooh which reminds me that on thursday I will also be dying my hair again, it hasn't been long since the last time we did it but I want it done for when i get my hair cut plus I'm going for a slightly different colour this time ('Caramel' instead of 'Ice Chocolate' for those of you who are interested...) so hopefully that turns out ok.

saturday we're all going to see the guinness premiership final at twickenham in order to cheer on our boys the London Wasps :D should be a good day out.

sunday I'm back to work, running a kids group in the morning and Space cells in the evening.

at some point this week I'd also like to get to the cinema to see the Sex & the City film (I know...I'm sad, but I really want to see it!)
plus I'm hoping to see some of my friends again since I tend to be quite rubbish at seeing them when I'm working!

oh and in uni news, I've been assigned some accomodation but its the ensuite one that is far from my campus so I've emailed them to see if it can be changed to the non-ensuite thats near my campus. I really wanted the ensuite ones that are near my campus but apparently I didnt get a place. I'd rather be in walking distance to my campus than have an ensuite if that's what it comes down to. the application form didn't let you specify that though! ah well, there's no harm in asking....

well that's a pretty long and full blog so I'm going to go and get some sleep, PJ wants me up early tomorrow to open presents...I know its his birthday but I don't want to get up early!! I already said I'd do 9am which is early for me when I'm not working but he wants me up at 8am or something ridiculous like that...ah well, we'll see what happens in the morning!

much love xxx

aha!

I've managed to blog exactly a week since last time!

this weekend we had our mission weekend at church which was fun, had alot of fun at Godzkidz doing prayer charts and prayer chains :)
then in the evening we had a cafe style service and had video link-ups with Tim & Helen, and Alison (some of our old youth leaders who are now in Albania and India respectively)

on sunday I also watched the awesome victory of Wasps who are now on their way to the Guiness Premiership final against Leicester which my family are going to watch at Twickenham...very exciting! we haven't been able to go watch Wasps this year because I've been working sundays so couldn't go.
but I'm very happy to be going to support my boys :)
I genuinely love watching rugby anyway and the fact that most of them are very good looking guys is a great bonus :D

right this week I've got a fair bit on but hopefully it'll whizz by and soon it'll be half term and I'll be able to have a bit of a break!
much love xxx

Desire Event 2008

Sorry this post is so late but I was just so exhausted after saturday that it's taken me a while to find the energy to write.

So the Desire event happened, it was very very good :D
Setting up on Friday was the most difficult part, it was generally manual work (moving chairs, tables etc) but the last hour of set-up was brilliant because we'd finished the majority of stuff so I got to sit with the band whilst they practised. It was alot of fun, I had a go at playing bass- I wasn't very good. Then I pretended to be Ed for a bit, I had to stand on tip-toes to reach his microphone and then I even tried playing the keyboard....it was certainly interesting!

To explain the Desire event:
Desire is an organization of youth workers across abingdon and the surrounding villages. This is the third year that a May Fun Day has been organized in our church carpark. Previously they've had an indoor ice-rink, a lazer-tag arena and many other inflatables. The big attraction this year was a climbing tower- along with loads of inflatables.
This year since i'm on the core Desire team I have been alot more involved in organizing it rather than just going to it.

Saturday morning came too quickly. I felt pretty good though walking round in my black Desire tshirt (only a few people got the black ones) which a first aid badge and walkie-talkie. It was weird because we've spent months planning this event and being there on the day I actually knew alot more than most of the volunteers and so people were looking to me to direct them and that was very strange.
First shift of the day and I was on the gladiator inflatable, it was slow starting because it was inside and the children arrived outside where all the climbing wall and other inflatables were so it took a while for people to come to it. Which was kinda good because I had other jobs I needed to run round and do, it also meant that Nicki and I managed to get a quick fight in!
Second shift of the day and I was on the sumo suits with Amy, it was exhausting work- because once the children fall over you have to pick them up in the suits and you also have to help them in and out of the suits....and those sumo suits are really heavy!

Before I knew it lunchtime had arrived and we got a chance to sit down for half an hour. Which didnt feel like very long, particularly since I already felt like I'd done an entire day's worth of work. But the youth were about to arrive!
Third shift of the day I was on the welcome desk which was possibly one of my favourite shifts of the day, I got to sit under a nice gazebo in the shade (oh by the way it was so hot all day- about 27 degrees or something) and greet the youth as they arrived. This was particularly great because I've done loads of assemblies so people kept recognizing me and wanting to chat which was cool.
Fourth shift of the day I was on the bouncy castle which was fun, Hannah W was there with me for most of it. The other part of the shift I had to run off a be a first aider for someone so I didnt actually spend alot of time at the bouncy castle.
Fifth shift of the day I was doing detached work/prayer shack. This was also a favourite shift of mine because I was in the prayer shack for the first bit which was great because by this point the event was starting to wind down and there wasn't anyone around who needed prayer so I got to hang out with Gabs for a bit.
Then I decided to wander around the site and talk to people which was also alot of fun. By the last half hour of the day alot of people had left mostly it was only our youth that were still around so I got to sit around and chat with them for a while. I even got roped into playing a bit of netball which made me feel like I was back in year 9 or something!

After helping to clear up for a bit I headed home to spend the rest of the evening with my family. It was a brilliant day, I had alot of fun but am still trying to recover.
The next day was of course a sunday which meant sunday school group in the morning (I was leading Splash which this week consisted of three rowdy 5-7 year olds!) and then church and Space cells in the evening.
This morning I went to the doctors to talk about my blood test results- she's pretty certain that everything's fine but wants me to have another blood test in about 3 weeks to just check that those levels are normal again.
Then I went to staff meeting which was good, afterwards I was told to clear my diary for the next 24 hours and get some rest which is nice. I have Fitz CU tomorrow lunchtime but other than that I get to just chill out for a bit which is particularly great because the weather is so nice today.

I have a fair bit of work to do later this week though since it's our mission weekend at church this coming weekend and I'm helping run the kids section of it at LF. Other than that I'm hoping for a quieter two weeks before I can have a proper break at half-term.

Currently I have a Sky man in my house fixing our Sky boxes so I'm just surfing the web and playing silly games on my laptop and trying to stay out of his way!
Hopefully he'll fix Sky so I can spend the rest of my afternoon crashed out in front of the TV!

Much love xxx

quick blog

I'm very busy preparing for the Desire event on saturday and i'll write a long blog about all of that on saturday evening hopefully.
other than that i dont have alot to say.
my second blood test came back with 2 levels raised so i'm seeing the doctor on monday to find out what that means next.
will blog properly at the weekend
much love xxx